What is your status? No not that kind of status. I’m talking about the Facebook relationship status. I was listening to the radio the other morning (Elvis Duran) and this girl called in saying how she was upset that her high school boyfriend went to college and changed his status from saying “in a relationship” to being completely blank. Before we all say “they’re gonna break up by second semester!”, let’s hold back on second. I know some of my friends swear by facebook relationship status thing. They even go as far as to make their profile pictures of them and their new love all lovey dovey in a pose to elicit awes from friends and family, because that’s what all their single friends are dying to see. Butwhen is this just not a good idea? or better yet, why do we care? The response was mixed. Some thought the guy was obviously cheating and some thought the girl was nuts psycho to even bring it up and think her relationship is in jeopardy because a social networking site told her that her boyfriend was not in or not in a relationship with her.
My philosophy has always been of the type that it’s no one’s business. The folks who know me well know if I’m dating someone; why make it public on facebook? It’s on a need to know basis. If you don’t know I’m seeing someone, then obviously we aren’t that close. It’s almost a form of PDA, and as someone who doesn’t partake in PDA unless I’m obscenely drunk, I just don’t get the point of putting on my facebook that I’m dating someone. I don’t push my relationships on my friends so don’t push it on me.I have and continue to leave that segment of my life blank. I’ve thought of changing it, but honestly, facebook is not a tool for me to find dates. Okay, that’s a lie. But I’m not going to advertise that I’m on the internet meat rack, ready to be eaten alive.
So to review: if you see me out with someone fine and we’re dating, don’t try to start something because my facebook status says otherwise. It’s none of your damn business who I do the late night creep with, and it’s none of my business what you do either. And for the record, I am single so this doesn’t apply. I’m just sayin’.
So I was out at a bar the other night and this guy walks up to me and asks if I am who he thinks I am. I respond “yes, why?” and he proceeds to tell me that he chatted with me years ago on connexion, remembers where I went to college, where I was from originally, bla bla bla. It must be like 4 years ago that i chat with him. The guy is … cute but definitely overweight. Seems nice enough but whatever. So then he e-mails me that night with his phone number and that I should call him so I just wrote back “thanks.” He comes back with “what’s your number?” I don’t want to be rude or anything but I don’t really want to hang out with him.It wasn’t like we had any meaningful conversation. So what do you think the next step should be?
Hi there F,
You left quite a mark didn’t you? First of all, weird. Ever stalker should know that you should feign dumb when admitting how much information about your stalkee you have stored in your head. Otherwise it’s clear you’re a stalker! I’m not saying it’s not okay to remember someone some years after the fact, I think that’s normal. It’s one thing to say “I met you at a conference x years ago” versus “you drank three vodka-rum concoctions at X Bar after the seminar session on how to target youth in advertising held by Buzz Killington.”
You have two options: ignore him or be honest and say you’re not interested. I’d go with the latter cause based on his history, the kid can’t take a hint. Plus really, sometimes it’s better to be straightforward. Be honest. Say something like “hey it was nice meeting you. have a good time, take care.” by saying “goodbye” to the kid you’re kinda blowing him off but not entirely.